So we all know that geeks are usually quite smart about many things. Food is not one of them. However, instead of using this article to rail against the  non-nutritional nature of geeky food I’m going to celebrate it. This was quite a large list I started with and had to nail it down to five of the most eaten and well known among us geeks. So here it is; I present you the five geekiest foods.

5. Pizza
So we all know that this food is pretty much eaten by everybody which is why it’s not higher on the list, however, geeks consume abnormally large amount of the stuff. Have you ever been to a friend’s house and seen that they have a pile of pizza boxes as tall as them? Me too. Honestly though can you blame us? Pizza is delicious, relatively cheap, and can be delivered right to your door. We could spend some time fixing a nice salad for ourselves, or we could go with convenience and finish this video game before daybreak. Now pass me slice of pepperoni before it gets cold.

4. Potato and Corn Chips
No LAN party (do those even happen any more?), tabletop game, or movie night would be complete without a bowl or bag of these crunchy delights. Say what you want about their fattening qualities; a good bag of chips will never let you down. They are cheap, taste great, and portable. We could go eat an apple, or we could open this bag of Doritos and share them with our friends. A bag of chips brings people together. Chips could save the world.

3. Energy Drinks
Every MMO player knows that they need three things: a computer, the internet, and an energy drink. Every tabletop gamer knows that they need three things: friends, imagination, and an energy drink. I think you see the pattern here. Not to be outdone by the skateboarders and extreme sports folks, we geeks have hijacked the energy drink market and made it our own. Don’t believe me? Check this out. Or how about this. That’s some pure geektacular stuff right there. You know, we could go get a glass of milk, or we could make sure we stay up until our hallucinations become real.

2. Instant Ramen Noodles
A staple of every gamer pantry is the venerable instant ramen noodle soup. Either eaten prepared or raw this handy snack can be flavored to suit any palate. There’s really not much more to say about this stuff as it’s got so much going for it that you can truly allow your imagination to wander as to new way to prepare and serve it. We geeks love choices, and instant ramen noodle soup delivers every time. We could go boil some vegetables, or we could add them too the Ramen noodle soup and get twice what we wanted.

1. Pocky
This snack is the geekiest food there is. I don’t know of anyone who eats this stuff who isn’t. Frankly I don’t know what geeks see in it as I think it tastes a little worse than cardboard. I have a hypothesis that all of the nasty cheap chocolate that isn’t consumed during Easter (I speak of those cheap hollow Easter bunnies, awful) is gathered from around the world and sold to the folks who make Pocky. They then dip their bland bread sticks into it and sell it to cheap suckers who want to eat something “made in Japan, whoopee!” We could go and get a Snickers bar, or we could…oh forget it.

There we have it, the five geekiest foods you can consume. Until next time.